There comes a point during deployment where you just become nonchalant about it all. I mean its like you forget what it felt like to have him home, to have him to talk to whenever you want. You think about it, and its like your childhood, a long distant old memory. And you think, it has to be even harder for him, because you at least have the house you resided in as a couple, the bed you shared, the children you created together. There are more things and places that spark those little memories.
Then the kids remind you. They start asking about Daddy. They pick up the mobile phone, which has a picture of him as wallpaper, and talk to him even though he isn't on the line. They say "Remember when Daddy..." and you do. Together these little people keep you grounded in the place that you and he had once occupied as a couple. These little parts of your relationship keep you from drifting so far into your single life. (Not the fun swinging single life, no its nothing like that- its harder, its lonelier, but you are still living that way- singly.)
You know he will eventually come home, and everything that you have become used to will flap away in the wind. You will have to find that place where you existed together. But at the same time, neither of you will be the same. You will have to learn to coexist again. And this time, with so much distance between you- it might not work. There may be things that have come between you, changes that are irreconcilable. You can hope it won't happen. But deep down you know its a possibility.
But you still trudge onward. Waiting out the longest year. Waiting out and knowing that although this part is hard- what lies ahead is even harder. But quite honestly? What else could you do?