12 Weeks Old

Natalie,

Dear sweet girl, in light of my issues lately, I need you to know how much I do love you. I know there will be times in your life when you will think I didn't want you, that is not the case. I am so happy that you are you and I can't imagine our life without you, even though you've only been here for 12 weeks.Today I went to Target and bought a baby monitor. I had one that a friend had given me, but over the last few years it had stopped working. I never had use for one with Gwennie. But she didn't really nap well. You, my lovely little fusspot, nap well. Like in the afternoon I lay down with you and you fall asleep, then I can extract myself from the bed. You will sleep. Sometimes you will even sleep for 3 hours. This is all new territory for me, because neither of your sisters were good nappers. Then again, you are a good sleeper... when you are in our bed. It is so cool how much more aware you seem now. And its amazing how much of your own person you are, different from your big sister, Gwennie at 3 months.Besides you being an awesome sleeper, you are a pain sometimes. You want what you want and you want it now. You can roll onto your stomach easily but you can't roll onto your back. I noticed that you have a sweet freckle on your fat left knee. I love it, no really, I stare it at often. Rhayn was about 18 months when she sprouted her first freckle, and Gwennie was older (though hers are on her face.) Both your dad and I have freckles all over our bodies, but I think most people do.

Although you look like Gwennie and Rhayn, you look most of all like... you. I look at you and I see wisdom in your brown (I think) eyes. Maybe its because they are brown, or maybe you are a wise one. Who knows. But we all love you, so much.

Especially me,
the mama