Last night I could not fall asleep. Seriously, I tried reading and watching a movie, but round about midnight I was still laying in bed, wide awake. I finally slipped peacefully into dreamland to be awoken at 3 am by a dog who needed to potty. I couldn't fall right back to asleep after that, either. It took me an hour and ten minutes to finally drift off.
Consequently my body aches this morning. I am thinking of taking a hot soaky bath after I feed Rhayn breakfast (well she can actually feed herself, the joys of an 8 year old!) but she isn't awake yet. I am trying to decide if this inability to sleep is due to Christmas looming on the horizon or something else. Most likely its Christmas and my fear of getting pregnant this month. I mean, it wouldn't be the end of the world, but I really REALLY REALLY don't want to get pregnant this month. I don't want to be due around Gwennie's birthday. I am obsessing about it. I think it might be a little bit of a mental tactic to keep my mind off of Christmas, but I have no proof. It is a ridiculous thing to worry about, we have been, um, active for years without getting pregnant, so why worry so much this month? I think its mainly because I have never wanted so badly to NOT fall pregnant. No, I take that back, I did not want to be pregnant while he was gone, at least not to have the baby while he was gone. It scared me more then. Plus, even though I wanted the option, I wasn't ready for it then. I am now, but just not this month.
Its been an hour and a half since I started this post. Kids and self are fed, bath was taken, and I feel a little better. I think I need a nap or coffee though. A nap while watching Christmas movies? Yes, please.