Feelings

I hate this feeling, this dull and empty feeling. I want to be happy, and I try, but I just feel dreary. I prefer feeling angry or upset to this monotonous, vacant sensation.
I think I feel this mostly towards Will, which is the worst part. I feel separated, emotionally, from him. I get this way sometimes when we haven't had any time together that was child-free.

This in no way means that I love him less, it just seems like we both get so caught up in our lives, his job and his websites, me being a mom and doing silly "housewife" stuff, that we are not on the same page in our family album.

Someone needs to smack me out of this.

It doesn't help that I have had my period for a week, its dragging out, and I am feeling weak from it. It doesn't help that this weekend is "Army weekend" for Will, which means he is in that mode and we really are on different paths this week. It really doesn't help that the girls and I had a cold which he managed NOT to get, so we've been sick while he is feeling great.

Most of all, it doesn't help that I haven't been talking to him about this feeling, and that really is the thing I need to do, most of all.