I need to let go.
I need to let it all go.
Let it out, these emotions I am holding tightly in myself.
I need to cry.
I need to cry those big ugly tears.
Big gasping sobs.
Because I am sad and overwhelmed by life.
And I have been keeping it all inside because I am afraid to let it out. Afraid my grief will consume me slowly from the outside in, instead of dissolving me from the inside out like it is now.
Because I can hide that. I can cover up that. And no one knows how sad I am inside.
But it is all fake, a cover, a sheet hung over a broken window to keep everyone from knowing it is broken.
But they know.
They know.

I sit here and feel the stinging of tears.
 But once again,
they refuse to fall.