20130228

Today

Today I have scheduled an ultrasound at one of those 3D places that aren't doctor offices. For a price they'll take a peek into your womb and tell you baby's gender and give some good pictures.

I am so excited to finally find out that we are for sure having a 4th girl. I have her named and everything.

When we were pregnant with Natalie and decided not to find out, I really thought, for me, that it would be the best way. I saw how sad my sister was at her 3rd daughter's ultrasound. I thought "well if I have the baby in my arms I won't care that it is another girl." And in a way it was true. I was happy she was born and healthy and I wouldn't trade her in.

BUT

I also dealt with serious PPD after her birth. I felt sad all of the time, I cried more. I wanted to crawl in a hole and not come out. Was it because she was SHE? I can't say for sure. What I do know is that I want to find out, so that if this is #4 girlie-girlie, I will have time, 4 months, to mourn my never-son, before her birth. And hopefully I will not deal with the same sort of issues after her birth.

And in the 1% chance that this is a little man, I will have time to make him some super cute boy stuff and get ready for something all new.

Most of all- I get to see a cute picture of my baby today. I will get to see her/him moving around in there. I will maybe even get another picture of sweet baby feet. I love ultrasound pictures of baby feet.

And in a few hours, hopefully, I will know.

2 comments:

tif-do said...

I sure hope you plan on telling the rest of us right away as well! Can't wait to find out! And I'm keeping my fingers crossed the little sweetie cooperates this time!

Anonymous said...

Good luck today! Thinking about you and hoping you are happy with the outcome. x

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