I'm having a really hard time right now. I wish I had someone I could call to just come over and visit with me and maybe bring the girls and I a healthy dinner. Because right now all I want to do is curl up on the couch and watch really stupid television shows. But I can't do that all day. The girls need their mom, they need to be fed. I have watched a lot of t.v. today, but we turned it off for a little while and cleaned. I gave each of us a room to clean and an hour to do it. It is nice to have clean rooms. But I still just want to sleep until Ray comes home. I don't want to be here, I do not want to be alone.
I've gone to a few meet-ups at parks. I'm trying to find friends and I definitely have acquaintances. I've seen a few of these ladies a few times. I even think I could like them when we've gotten to know each other. But none of them are people I could call for an impromptu dinner. I really miss my Phoenix friends. No, I still don't miss Phoenix herself. I miss being close enough to my family to make a quick day trip over there when I needed to surround myself with my family.
Maybe I need a book series I can't put down. I'm rereading a book right now because I found out it is the first in a trilogy and I bought the 2nd and 3rd, but its been years since I read the first book so I started it over. Maybe I'll go sit on the couch and read for a while, since for this moment, the girls are playing nicely. Maybe I will feel better tomorrow. But right now I can't see how that will ever happen.