20100728

Update

For over two weeks I have held it in, close to my heart. Our little secret. I shared it only with those I felt I might need were something to go wrong, or those I was just too excited to tell. I waited it out, not wanting the disappointment again of losing something.

I am baring it all once again. Things look good. The symptoms I never got last time, because it all ended so early are here and in full force. Nothing smells appetizing. Nothing tastes good. I can barely eat. I gag all day long. I want to sleep all day long. Its wonderful and terrible at the same time.

I force myself to eat, nibbling at the moment on cold pinto beans. Knowing that eating makes the queasiness go away, if only for a short while. I allow myself to throw up, because its easier than trying (unsuccessfully) not to. I let myself sleep, knowing that Rhayn will take care of Gwennie and that Will will feed then dinner when he gets home at night.

I am thankful for this, and know it is short lived. In 6 or so weeks this nausea will taper off. In the end, in a mere 34ish weeks time, we will welcome a new member into our family. The girls are excited. Gwennie seems a little nervous about it. She asks me about the baby and loves looking at pictures of the growing embryo in "A Child is Born" and tells me and everyone else that the reason I feel so bad is because of the baby.

Its beautiful. Its exciting. Its terrifying.

I had an ultrasound on Monday and measured 6 weeks. "Clover" (my nickname for the baby that will be born around St. Patrick's Day although I have considered "Bunny" because he/she will be born in the year of the rabbit) had a tiny little heartbeat, even though there was really only a dot to see.

10 comments:

Briep said...

The picture of your alien baby on the side is kinda freaking me out! But I am so excited they will only be 6 months apart plus they have a little cousin in between them!!!!

Elise said...

Thanks for coming yesterday. I know we didn't spend a lot of time together but it was still good to have the group together.

Anonymous said...

Well hello happy dance!!!!!!

Meli said...

Oh my goodness ... CONGRATS!!!
I am so super excited for you guys!!!
YAY!

Mid-life Midwife said...

Oh yaay! And many blessings and sticky, healthy baby prayers your way!

Amie said...

awesome...wonderful...I hoped that was what was going on! perfect timing too...it'll be cool by the time you get bigger, and it'll still be cool when you have the baby. good luck and enjoy!

Anonymous said...

So happy for you!!! Try to get some rest. Can't wait to follow your pregnancy and birth. xxx

bodaat said...

oh wow! congratulations helena!! what such great news! :)

bradagenda said...

Holy crap, you're gonna have a lot of kids! Well, I guess it's not that many (my mom had 3 kids), but after having recently become a first-time father, I can't even imagine it.

April said...

Congratulations! I know this baby was very much wanted by the two of you. Best of luck with your pregnancy!

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