I am a mess but at least not a "hot mess"

Will's brother and family came down to see him come home. So we went to see them this morning. The thing is that in order to get to where they were, we had to drive a similar route as we would have been taking had we been going to get Will. Only the mood in our car was awful. It took everything in me to keep from crying. I was a mess.

If we had been picking him up, we would have left the house only about fifteen minutes earlier. Every plane I saw in the sky made me think "Well that could be the one the rest of the unit is on..." But I kept this all to myself. I wanted to wail about it, but the girls are sad enough. I kept quiet. I tried to hold the tears in.

I did pretty well, until on the way home, driving a similar path, I started thinking that we get gypped from the cool unit homecoming you see on the evening news. We won't be surrounded by the rest of the units' families all with the same feelings inside. The girls didn't get to see the friends they had made jump into the arms of their dads. And we have to wait, wait, wait while they are all enjoying their families.

Its just not fair.