Slings and Birth Worries
If you think this looks mean- well it isn't. My cat is loving that (she didn't like that I was standing up, but when I sat down she was a purring fool.
As you can see, I actually sewed 2 days in a row! WHOO HOO!!! I made 2 slings today. My cat weighs about 7 pounds, when Rhayn was born Floh weighed more than her! So she is a good weight to see what holding a baby in a sling will feel like (however I won't have a big belly in the way then!)
Rhayn carries her baby doll "squish baby" in her
sling often. Hers is a "no sew" one. Made out of the rings and an old sarong. She loves it though.
I have even started addressing envelopes to send out for birth announcements. I know that after her birth, I won't do anything. I will sleep a lot. I had a million plans for after Rhayn was born but was such a total slacker, I never even sent out birth announcements.
Dreams during pregnancy can be very...um... strange. I have had some weird ones lately. In one I was pumping (ugh something I hate doing) and my milk was lumpy. It looked rotten but it wasn't.
Last night I had the baby and I can pretty clearly remember that she looked almost just like Rhayn as a baby. She wouldn't wake up to eat and I kept trying to wake her up to feed her.
In nearly every labor related dream I have the midwife is not there. I think it means that her presence is more for my dh and less for me. I mean I feel confident in my body's ability to birth and to know what to do. I don't need her there for that, so in my dreams I think she is absent and I am usually in a room with just my dh because I don't feel like I personally NEED her. I am glad she will be there. I can't imagine- really- if she weren't. I don't think I am quite up to unassisted birth. Her support is appreciated, her calming presence in case of emergency. I am not a calm person in emergency.
Dh thinks he is able to stay calm. However when I was having a miscarriage a few years ago, he didn't handle my pain very well. It was miserable because he was stressed out about it, and I was too. I needed him to just take care of Rhayn but he couldn't concentrate enough to make her food. I have talked to him about that. I don't know if he'll be the best birth partner, but at least I have been through childbirth once, so I have a better idea of what to expect. (Not that this means much since all births are different AND this will be a new experience just because we will be at home.) I really hope he is able to support. I need him to be there for me.