But I never considered having a "big" family myself. (Our family only has 5 kids, me being the oldest, 3 boys followed by my baby sister.) When I got pregnant at 22, unmarried, I never considered more than 2 kids. I wanted them close in age. I wanted them to be best friends like I was with my 14 months younger brother. This was not to be the case.
Rhaynnon was an only until 4 1/2, then we had Gwen and I did long for a 3rd, and hopefully a sweet little brown eyed boy. For another few years we discussed a 3rd baby until Will deployed and Gwen was 3. We decided that we might be done. However when he came home, we changed our minds and had Natalie, 5 1/2 years Gwen's junior.
Having our kids spread out so much makes life hard I think. When one child is 11 and starting to enter puberty she is less likely to play the imagination games of the nearly 7 year old, and the 7 year old likes things "just so" which makes playing with the baby hard.
I know that having a big family would be hard, too. Or having all three in a 5 year period (looking at you sweet sis) or even 3 years (and you brother and sil!) But I can imagine how much happier your kids will be at school. With built in friends on family vacations. Because I remember how much better off I was, I knew no one would ever hurt me without the wrath of Garrett. I knew that even though we went on a 3 week tour of the Midwest, I would have my siblings there to keep me entertained.
I know I can't go back in time and change the way we've brought these beautiful children into the world. I wouldn't want to change them in any way. I can only hope to do what is best for them, now in this moment, and hope that they will learn what they need to before moving on to the next part of life.