I feel like being a sheep today. So lets go over my last decade. I am going to start in 1999, because that year changed me.
1999- I was living with my aunt in Colorado, I had a good job (at a 7-11) I was saving money. I missed Arizona, and in August, I just left. No warning, I left a note on my aunt's couter, put all of my stuff in my car and came home, to some friends. Only I had changed from the punk rock chick they had known. I never felt fully comfortable at their house. Well I did, as long as my then boyfriend was at a work. That is really sad. I turned 22. I moved in with another friend after then-boyfriend broke up with me.
2000- I brought in the new year sick. We stayed home, my roommate, my friend DJ and I. I toasted the new year with nyquil. In January, I met Will at a house/apartment party. We dated exactly twice. We got pregnant, I miscarried. He asked me to marry him (I said yes.) Then I broke it off, before finding out I was pregnant again. I lived with my parents in my teenage-self's room.
2001- I had Rhayn in March. I learned so much about letting go. Will and I got back together. It was really rough. I had not been nice, and had hurt him. (I would spend most of the rest of the decade trying to make up for this.) On September 11th, as the towers came crumbling down, Rhayn had surgery to correct a cleft palate. I moved in with Will shortly before Rhayn's surgery. Even bringing my cat up to his house.
2002- Stayed home, (at Will and my casa) did day care out of the house. Will and I started talking about buying a house. I became pregnant in the summer, and miscarried again. This time the baby never grew past 5 weeks, even though I carried "him" until 11.
2003- In February Will and I finally married. This came after a discussion with his brother and her wife about why we hadn't married yet. Also, I didn't understand why he was willing to buy a house with me, but not willing to marry me. We moved into our house in June. I had to work for a while to help make ends meet. Houses cost more than you could ever really budget, all of those hidden fees (trash? What?)
2004- I continued working until the spring. Will joined the Army National Guard and left for basic training in August. He was gone for 10 weeks. At the time I had no idea how I would make it through that. I was so glad when it was over. We decided to try to have another baby.
2005- I was pregnant. I was sick. Rhayn turned 4. I planned a homebirth. This occupied all of my time. I looked into schools for Rhayn. Gwennie came to our family in September, closely followed by her cousin, Madders. (I think/hope they will always be close.)
2006- Rhayn turned 5. Will worked for the Army around this time, and sometimes was gone long hours working on the Arizona - Mexico border. When he was at the base we were spoiled by military time (him being home at 4ish.) Rhayn started kindergarten at the Waldorf charter school. Gwennie turned 1.
2007- Uh... well its all documented on this blog. I can't think of a lot that happened that year. We all thrived.
2008- Will received the call we knew he would eventually get. It changed everything we had planned for that year. He would leave in the early fall for Iraq. Before that he had a couple of classes he had to complete. We stop comunicating, he turns to WoW and I turn to? I don't know, but its not pretty and not good for our relationship. When he left in September it was bittersweet. I worried about what would happen when he came home, but also how I would deal with him being gone. I turned to those around me and found so much more than I ever thought I would have. I found my village.
2009- Longest year. Will came home in late February for a few weeks. He had to leave again on Rhayn's 8th birthday. I hope it will always remain her worst. birthday. ever. The year dragged on. I learned a lot about myself. It made me find my inner strength. I can do anything. I also had (and have) many choices. I choose to be happy. When Will came home, we reconnected in a way I never thought we would. I think that our relationship strengthened because of the time away. I fell in love with him all over again.
And I can not wait to see where the new decade leads us.