I was given this award by three people. That is totally awesome. I wish I had been in a better state of mind and able to respond quickly. In order to receive this award, I am supposed to write ten honest things about myself. I am finding this hard to do, with out a very dark edge to it. (It took me four hours to write this.)
1. When I was younger I really disliked, bordering on hated, dogs. Really. We had one dog that I loved while growing up. I tolerated our dogs, but I only loved Spike, he was a Brittany spaniel that we got through a divorce of one of my dad's friends. It wasn't until my brother got a dog names Cur (she was a German Short-Hair pointer) that I saw how great a dog could be. And ever since we got Lily, I have been a dog lover.
2. When I am sick I like to watch really crappy Behind the Music type programs on TV and music videos, but since we got rid of cable, I end up watching Friends or Frasier on DVD.
3. I love American's Next Top Model, its a guilty pleasure of mine. I also enjoy Project Runway. But can't stand most reality shows.
4. I once took off with a boyfriend and lived with him in his van for 2 months. We went to Salt Lake City, UT and Denver, CO.
5. The only type of music I don't regularly listen to is country. But I will listen to it when I need to cry.
6. I would love to move to another state, but at the same time, I really want to stay here, it is an internal struggle that I battle with constantly.
7. I want to be a homebody, and have a super clean/organized house with a set schedule, instead I feel like I am running around like a chicken with her head cut off most of the time.
8. I am seeking counseling for myself, and when Will gets home, we will attend it as a couple. I don't know if it will help, but feel like it can't hurt us. For me, I think I need it. I am overwhelmed and struggling to cope at the moment.
9. You would never know (most days, yesterday was a total fluke, I lost the ability to hold it together) when you see me, that I am losing my mind. I hide my feelings and emotions well. I laugh it off while dying inside. This is not good and what is making me think maybe that I need couseling (see number 8.)
10. I really dislike talking on the phone. There, I said it. I will email to my hearts content, but talking on the phone is hard. I think that is partially why this deployment has been so hard. When your relationship is reliant upon those phone calls as a way to connect, and you dislike being on the phone... well it leads to a real disconnect between partners.
And now for those that I feel deserve this award...
I send it back to the three who gave it to me. Thanks Mo, Bodaat and Urban Homesteader!
I am picking 5. (Half the number of honest things they need to say!)
1. Tiff over at A Hatful of Nothing.
2. Alicia at How I Became a Tattooed Mommy.
3. Jess at Mommy Musings
5. And Amie at Life with the Boys.