I feel so much better today! I really felt like death yesterday. That headache was miserable, and the fever/chills, horrid! I have never felt like that before!
I am so mad, because some how the stupid "shortcut" buttons on the keyboard have lost what I was typing. Without knowing it, I went back two screens, I tried to go forward again, but NO, my long post was lost... So I will try to retype it. The above was a post that I started this morning, but someone was hungry, so I had to feed her. I didn't get back here until now. Its been a long day.
As a teenager I kept a journal, I was always writing down my thoughts and feelings. I also was deathly afraid someone would find that, and read it. I couldn't bear the thought of anyone reading my thoughts. I even once had a boyfriend who read my journal. (When I lived in Colorado, I kept it in my unlocked car- DUH, where anyone could get it, and he said I never told him anything, so he read it- all of it.) I felt so violated and upset. But really those thoughts would have been better off being said. Most of that dealt with him, and my feelings towards him. So why didn't I tell him? Why have I always felt so closed off?
Now, I write similar thoughts on here. The only real difference? I WANT people to read them. I want to know that I am not crazy. And because I want those around me, those who are important in my life to KNOW ME, to really know me, the person inside. I like myself now, and I think that makes a WORLD of difference.