Its Sunday, ALREADY?

Another day came and went yesterday, with only the joy of some indigestion from going out for Indian food. It was as usual a delicious experience. I love raita, and all of those tasty chutneys! Mmmm I almost want to go back for another round (but after laying in bed for hours wishing my tummy would stop trying to turn inside out- I think I am good!)

Have I really mentioned my fears? I mean, its not the actual birthing part I am so afraid of, not the pain, or the "mess." Its Will- not being here. Then there is the fact that this next weekend is ARMY weekend, and there is a good chance those bastards will make him go even though he has a tiny, little, newborn at home, and a big girl who will really need her daddy in those first days.

I keep thinking "if she were born today- we'd have 9 days before drill," or today- its only 5 days until drill. If she waits to be born AFTER, then I will have the whole weekend fearing that she will decide its finally time and I will be alone. I will have to try to get ahold of him- via Army people, so it will be nearly impossible. I think I would rather she be born and just not have him for a few days. Its all just so worrisome to me!

Then again- she could easily wait until the day after he gets back, but he will be nearly useless, since he is usually so beat after drill.

I need to just get over this, its all going to play out how it will play out. I obviously can't make her come out, and I can't make her stay in. So we will just have to wait until she deems it the perfect moment.